2010
09.12

(short ramblings)

I have to learn to write more frequently here. Not every entry have to be a great essay and a three-hundred page long novel.

I can read some notes, and I can play a song on the recorder.

I have rats. Autumn is coming.

***

Here is a sudden poem from last night;
————————————

What is this twilight?
what is this shadow falling over me?
what is the darkness inside
from which I cannot escape or hide?

in the darkness all cats are grey
and all white dogs and all black cats
are all the same; with snapping jaws
and glowing eyes in the night

don’t go out in the night
don’t go out in the woods all alone
because all shadows are the same
when they are after you, my friend

the darkness inside
is the darkness outside
the calm serenity outside
is the chaos and pain within

(see me see me see me)

don’t go out in the woods tonight
don’t breathe the chilly autumn air
stay inside your lair, nest, burrow
stay hidden within yourself

the darkness inside
is the darkness outside
the calm serenity outside
is the chaos and pain within

What is this chilly autumn night?
the icy cold burning in my blood?
what is the darkness inside
from which I cannot escape or hide?

in the darkest night all cats are grey
and all white dogs and all black cats
are all the same; with snapping jaws
and glowing eyes just like mine

Congratulations.
/pao – 12 sept 2010 – 14.30

2010
09.05

Autumn

heavy sky steel grey and lead blue grey / dove grey dove blue doves flying across the sky / playing and singing / black white magpie patterns scattered over the green floor / digging searching / waiting for the heavy autumn rains / which are coming / which are coming / soon…

My dear man of stone and sea returned to visit me for a while, and like the last time, he brought autumn with him. But this time, even though I’m already hurting slightly due to the cold, I know there are things I must do.

I have ratlings burning with life.

And for some reasons I have a red-green Magic the Gathering deck of cards which I bought/got today. Two of the cards are in Russian, but I wanted them; Pao is an incredible creature capable of great acts of awesome linguaphilia even when being a gamer.

Time to sleep now.

Autumn is coming, and my songs are getting sadder.

And paoblog is getting updated again. Fear.

/pao – 5 sept 2010 – 04.30